It'll Be Okay - Just Dance

 I hate powdered coffee creamer....

Today’s Date: 1.8.13

Mood: I’m in a great mood today! We’ll also call it “reflective” – I had a VERY emotional moment in my Just Dance class last night though: an hour and 15 minutes into class (15 min left to go) I just got – well – emotional. I started thinking about the high school version of me. Picked on and tormented. Barked at when I walked down the hall. (usually by the same little group of girls). I was thinking about all the crap I allowed myself to go through all throughout my 20’s and how I let people (at this point mostly men) make me feel terrible about myself.   ……………Except one.
And I get mad at him when he tells me good things about myself. :/ I vow that next time I see him, I’m going to apologize for cutting myself down in front of him and thank him for being there and for his kind words and for (I think) actually meaning them.
…It started when the instructor was on her little microphone happily screaming words of encouragement. “Come on girls! MOVE! Squat lower! Jump higher! HAVE FUN! … but don’t do this for me! DO THIS FOR YOU!” –for a moment I really thought about going up to her after class and telling her “my story” and thank her for reminding me of things deep down I guess I already knew. --- doesn’t mean I wont still have bad days. Doesn’t mean I don’t still hate my body… but knowing that I can go there and have someone chipper and encouraging and having fun and pushing me harder … and then to have the “love” of a good friend (male) who – let’s be honest here… has shown me more love in my life than any man. (including, and possibly especially… my dad). Because of them… I really think I can do this. It’s not doing it for them. It’s for me. But I guess I feel like me pushing myself harder and getting results (eventually) that that is somehow my ‘thank you’. Thank you for believing in me. Thank you for pushing me. … Thank You For Loving Me.

Health: other than waking up feeling like my hip was completely dislocated from my pelvis… I feel fine. And it has nothing to do with dance class or the gym… but rather my “bed” – or lack thereof. Still sleeping on the futon. My bed is sitting in my parents garage until they can get it to me. *sigh*. When I do finally get my bed, I’m taking a day off from everything and staying there ALL DAY!
Also – being a lot more self-aware when it comes to my posture. Sitting up a little more straight. (working on those core muscles)

Weather:  ffffffrrrreeeeeeeeeeeezzzziiiinnngggg!!! But I’ve got a space heater at my desk and hot tea (raspberry) so I’m feeling better

Outfit: uh. Jeans ( I don’t know the brand) a pink Style&Co ribbed tank (can you tell I worked at Macy’s) and a black, long sleeved Harley Davidson hooded “waffle” shirt. With extra-long sleeves and a hole cut out (factory) for the thumb. (with wings on the back) and the TK IV II I symbol painted on the hand with fabric paint. Pink and black Pumas
            >>> nails: same OPI nail polish from yesterday

>>>accessories: I have my homemade headbands on and my Ed Hardy dog tag

>>>makeup: simple. Just neutrals and browns. Very soft and earthy.

Currently reading: 11/22/63 – Stephen King  (and Fitness Magazine January Issue, and Women’s Health Magazine January/February Issue)

Thought/Quote of the Day:  “DOTHIS FOR YOU!”

Song of the Day: Lady Gaga Just Dance

Picture of the Day: 

   

This made me LOL:
 The Ten Worst Songs of 2011
The Ten Worst Songs of 2012

-Gotta go make that $! brb

                                                                                                             

xoxo - Roxy