Everybody - at some point in their childhood was assigned an essay to write about what they wanted to be/do/accomplish when they grow up. If not, they spent a great deal of time thinking about it.
Personally - my childhood thoughts of being a grown-up consisted of staying up as late as I wanted, eating whatever I wanted (whenver I wanted), NOT going to school, voting, and not having anybody tell me what to do, and above all: freedom. Nobody ever told me that when I did receive each of these freedoms, there would be strings attached.... nobody ever told me I was dreaming a pipe dream...
When we were being told "You can be whatever you want to be" they conveniently forgot to mention that there was a big huge ominous "but" at the end of that sentence....which then began a whole new sentence (a pun consisting of the multiple meanins of "sentence"... think about it)
But back to my original childhood dreams of being grownup....Well.....Let's examine each one of them individually, shall we?
Staying up late: Sure.... I do stay up past my childhood bedtime of 8:30pm, but this is mainly due to the fact that piles of household chores must be done, some of which can't even begin until after my own children are in bed. In grown-up fantasy land - I'd be in bed the minute I arrived home from work... staying up late is FAR overrated....
Eating whatever/whenever I want: The 80+ pounds of excess body weight I'm currently carrying can easily answer that question. No - I'd be better off having someone else plan my meals for me.... LOL!!!
NOT going to school: Once I had the freedom to NOT go to school - I took advantage of it. The kick in the head came when I realized that if I'm not going to school (post-high school) then I had to get a job... OMG.... a JOB ?!?!?!?! Nobody ever mentioned what a shitty deal this is !!! Sure - there's no essays, research papers or calculus tests.... but the nasty homework that comes along with a job is PAYING BILLS !!! *cringe* I'd rather have the calculus....
not having anybody tell me what to do: >excuse me while I laugh my ass off< HAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA..... *wipes tear* I still have my parents telling me what to do.... my bosses at work tell me what to do... my
children tell me what to do... and of course the government tells me what to do... (at this point I will abruptly STOP speaking on this line of thought because this blog is not intended to be deeply political... if I am permitted to continue down this road, it will become so)
Freedom: This is perhaps, the most hilarious of all. Yes, I have the freedom to eat what I want, and watch what I want on TV (provided I can pay for the cable service) and wear what clothes I want (if I can find something decent in my gargantuan size) and practice (or not) whatever religious beliefs I may prefer (the government doesn't persecute for this... but society sure as hell still does)
Yes - I do have these few pseudo-freedoms.....each has their own stipulation, mostly to do with money. This takes me back up to the not-going-to-school "perk"... yes, in order to take advantage of most freedoms afforded to us adults, I need money. In order to get money, I must work a job. In order to get paid from said job, I must show up at a prearranged time each and every day, perform perfectly and make pleasantries with other people around me. <side note: the other people around me also claim to be grownup... however, more often than not, these other grownups spend the vast majority of their time acting like children of varying immaturity levels>
Since I must spend x amount of time at a job to get my meager restitution, I have very little time for the "freedoms" that led me to seek a job in the first place. For example: travel - no, I can't travel anywhere of note because that would take a large amount of time - time which I cannot take away from work because they would stop paying me. Since travel is no longer free (and foot travel is now frowned-upon) money is required for that as well.... if you're traveling out of the country, there are certain FEES (more money) and documents required in order to even be granted permission (again - freedom??) to go....
*sigh* I digress......
OH!! And let's not forget the many little hidden "joys" of being an adult woman...
(other than the montly surprises designed simply to let us know we're not pregnant..)
Nobody ever told me about the social prejudices, the domestic expectations, the self-criticism that evolves out of nothing...
And if you dare to gain any extra weight...a whole NEW set of "joys" are suddenly yours: You're thought to be lazy & dirty... Cute clothes are damn near impossible to find...You sweat in the strangest places... And if you're lucky enough to have squeezed out a baby or two - you pee your pants every time you dare to cough, sneeze, or sometimes, even laugh too hard. NOPE - nobody ever told me about THAT!!!
If I believed in a diety, I'd take this evidence I have laid out to you, and put it in a most sincere request to revert myself back to a state of permanent childhood. (with a bit of colorful "WTF were you THINKING" launguage somewhere in the middle, of course - LMAO)
{This ends the ranting part of today's entry... now back to our regularly scheduled program}
Date: January 8, 2013
Weather: REALLY cold - but with a promise of 60+ degrees over the weekend
Health: I bit my tongue yesterday at some point - so now half of it is swollen and irritated, making it difficult to speak, swallow and eat anything.
Song of the Day: "Peaches" by The Presidents of the United States of America (courtesy of my 9 year old daughter, who for some inexplicable reason was singing it at breakfast this morning)
I am without picture or quote of the day.... however, stay tuned... if my mood continues down this road, I very well might update later (actually I think I'm required to do so since I never did post an entry yesterday :-\)
